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Debanjali's avatar

Y’all’s bond is so precious. 😭 I relate so deeply to your words re: breaking generational trauma. ✨

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Neghar Fonooni's avatar

Thank you, boo! I think so many of us around or mid 30s to mid 40s are all kind of in that same boat re: generational trauma. I suppose it helps to not be alone in this club no one wanted a membership to lmao.

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Jenny Robertson's avatar

Oft! As always I find your writing about your relationship with your son and your processing of the breaking of family shit so helpful. My son is ten. I had him older in my life and that piece feels important because I’m not sure I could do it this way before. And also…I don’t get it right so often I’m sure. I love the last part about repair and solidarity when he may need to process parts of his own lived experiences. Yes to this. I know that my relationship with my parents, my dad in particular, could be so so different if he could just be open to seeing me as I am and maybe offering the odd piece of acknowledgment and repair. What a difference that would make. Love this. Thank you 🙏

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Neghar Fonooni's avatar

I sometimes imagine what a different parent I would have been had I become one later in life. I think there is a lot of value in becoming a mother in your late thirties and forties and I often wish I had been given the chance to do it again with a second child. Ten is such a precocious, tender, and curious age. Enjoy xx

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Jenny Robertson's avatar

I totally get it! I also wonder what it would be like to be a younger, more energetic and less perimenopausal mum 😬😮‍💨😅 you’ve done a beautiful job as you can see your son is one special kid. ❤️

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Kirsty Prince's avatar

Yes! Parenting young kids while navigating perimenopause definitely makes savouring it all quite a bit more challenging. Would love to have more energy but at least I have more resources and personal insight than I did in my 20s so that’s gotta help.

I’m a psychology student about to embark on a thesis and parenting during perimenopause is an area I’m strongly considering for my thesis.

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Neghar Fonooni's avatar

That sounds like a fascinating (and under represented) thesis topic!

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Jenny Robertson's avatar

Just saw this! That would be immense! 🙌🏼

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Kirsty Prince's avatar

This is beautiful Neghar, and it moved me in so many ways.

I am doing all that I can to break cycles and have a great relationship with my kid one day when she’s grown (especially affection and saying sorry when I mess up, because I never heard that word growing up.)

Your relationship with Isaac is one to aspire to! And your writing always reminds me to savour my parenting journey, even when it’s challenging. Thanks for these beautiful words.

x

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Neghar Fonooni's avatar

Thank you for reading and for leaving such valuable and warm feedback. I think apologizing to our kids is certainly more common in our generation and it really does go a long way towards healing those parenting wounds. Wishing you all the slow, savored moments with your little one.

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DC's avatar

I adore your bond with Isaac, it's beyond beautiful.

Each and every time I devour your work, I'm viscerally affected- my wee heart feels like it cracks open, your ethereal energy cascades in, and my soul is hugged by it, from the inside out. You, speaking on motherhood, with the unconditional love you share with your son, the young gentleman you're raising, it's tangible how close you guys are.

This piece in particular, came with a shift on my perspective - I must make more effort with my Mum, treasure her and the time we have and shower her with the love and care she deserves.

Hats off to all you Mothers, globally!

Thank you, for sharing of your artistic gifts with the world - You're one incredible human/woman/soul/earthling! Mad love from Scotland!

🤍🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿💙

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Neghar Fonooni's avatar

Your comment brought me to tears; thank you from the depths of my little artist heart! Sometimes it can feel like screaming into the void when I share my work with the world. You remind me that people are listening and my words matter. Appreciate you. xx

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